Nearly every person has a great many negative feelings
about death. In general, people try to avoid these feelings because
of the discomfort they produce. This means that the feelings remain
suppressed in the subconscious mind, where they reduce happiness
and exert an adverse influence on behavior. Vivation permanently
integrates all of these feelings and eliminates their effects. Because
these feelings and their integration through Vivation are so important,
I want to share some of what I know from my vast experience of giving
more than 45,000 Vivation sessions in twenty-one countries over
the last twenty-three years. Besides this experience of helping
thousands of other people resolve their feelings about death, this
article is based on even more important experiences that I have
had integrating my own feelings about death over all these many
years.
There are two general categories of negative feelings
about death: feelings that create resistance to dying and feelings
that direct a person toward dying. Both of these categories are
equally important to resolve. Both categories rob people of energy,
happiness, enthusiasm, and rationality. In the most extreme cases
both of these categories result in premature death from accidents,
diseases, suicide, self-destructive behaviors, and self-neglect.
Emotional states related to resistance to death include
fear, frustration, anger, boredom, sadness, grief, hopelessness,
worry, anxiety, depression and others. On a very superficial level,
a person might thing that being negative about death could extend
a person’s life, but in truth negativity never serves anyone in
any way. All of these emotions, doing their work at the subconscious
level, harm performance, health, and happiness. Furthermore, the
behaviors that people engage in for the purpose of avoiding these
feelings often put the person at risk and always divert the person
from the enthusiastic pursuit of their purpose in life. One thing
about death is that it is not actually happening to oneself at this
particular moment. If we want to be happy, then we need to be able
to focus attention on the present. All of the negative emotions
about death take one’s attention out of present time.
Then there are also emotional reasons to seek death.
The most obvious of these is to think of death as a means of escape.
Most healthy people do not think seriously of committing suicide,
but many people have suicide in their mind somewhere as a possible
solution to suffering, were it ever to become too extreme. This
is true despite the undeniable logic that doing physical damage
to oneself sufficient to bring about death cannot possibly be a
good thing for one to do. I have a great deal of compassion for
all who suffer, certainly including those who attempt or commit
suicide, but because I know Vivation I also know that there is always
a much better alternative. From the point of view of Vivation, suppression
is seen as being closely akin to suicide. All suppression results
in a reduction of the flow of life-force energy in the body. One
thing to say about suicide is that it is suppression taken to its
extreme. When part of the mind has suicide as a possible escape
from suffering, at least that part of the mind is not going to contribute
much to thinking things through well enough to find real solutions.
It is better to integrate all of this kind of death urge so that
it exerts no further influence on mind or emotions.
These twins of negativity about death, death-seeking
and death-avoidance also manifest in people’s feelings about the
death of other people and not just about one’s own death.
First I’m going to address people’s fascination with
the death of strangers, both real and imaginary. Modern people are
no less entertained by other people’s death than were the ancients
who loved to watch gladiatorial combats, which were sometimes fought
to the death. Nowadays people see a huge amount of death, usually
simulated, when they watch television, video games and other entertainment.
Only a tiny percentage of all movies contain no death. Even children’s
shows are only slightly better and are often full of death.
Many people bring death to mind when thinking about
foreigners and people of different political, and sometimes religious
points of view. Because of my work, people talk to me about things
they don’t often talk to others about. People have much more hatred
of various groups of strangers than anybody wants to admit, and
in their private fantasies these hatreds often lead to visions of
war, mass murder, and death. People also sometimes have fantasies
of death for the very people that are closest to them, such as husbands,
wives, and co-workers.
Then, too, people have very strong and complex negative
emotions activated by the deaths of others. It is normal and healthy
for people to go through a period of grieving when someone close
dies, but is not normal or healthy for people to continue grieving
for years at a time. I have helped thousands of people cope more
effectively with grief, and through Vivation, to recover the memories,
pleasure, learning, and benefits associated with the lost person’s
life, instead of remaining overwhelmed by the person’s death. Some
people also engage in grieving-in-advance and obsess about a loved
one’s death while the person is still living. This is not a sign
or manifestation of love.
So, we can readily see that people do not mainly accept
death as a natural part of life, but instead carry with them huge
amounts of negative emotions that cause problems not just on a personal
level, but also on an inter-personal, and even political and global
level.
All of these feelings integrate permanently with Vivation.
It is universally advantageous to integrate all negative emotions
from all sources–most definitely when it comes to negative emotions
connected to death. With Vivation, it is perfectly possible for
everyone to develop completely healthy attitudes toward death, neither
seeking it nor avoiding it, but being able to face it squarely.
This emotional health improves physical health, happiness, and enthusiasm
for everyone.
Vivation integrates feelings about death in just the
same way that it integrates feelings about everything else, but
I also have some additional information to share that is specific
to this application.
One thing has to do with people’s beliefs about death,
religious and otherwise. Vivation works directly at the feeling
level and so does not involve telling anybody what to believe. I
have personally taught Vivation successfully to people of all major
religions, committed atheists, and of course many people who have
invented their own systems of religious beliefs. I have never asked
any of these people to change their beliefs about death or anything
else. People’s beliefs are just none of my business, although I
often find them interesting when people do choose to share them
with me.
The vast majority of people have some belief about
death to which they cling quite rigidly. This gives people a certain
comfort and helps them to suppress their feelings about death. Because
of the way Vivation works, it automatically bypasses all suppression,
through all methods, including rigidly held, suppressive beliefs
about death. Were this not true, Vivation would not work for anybody.
As it is, Vivation works perfectly for everybody. Vivation simply
bypasses all the traps and complexities of the mind, including rigid
beliefs.
There are some people, however much in the minority,
who admit that they do not know what death is. They have considered
many ideas and possibly religious points of view, and decided not
to attach themselves to any one of them. To these people, for the
purpose of integrating feelings about death as efficiently as possible,
I do have some advice. My advice, for those who feel able to do
it, is to keep a completely open mind and to allow death to remain
a mystery. For those who can do so, it is best to admit complete
ignorance and to acknowledge that they have no idea whatsoever what
their subjective experience of death is going to be like. This point
of view, although by no means necessary, is ideal, not necessarily
for every purpose under the sun, but for simply exposing and integrating
all the suppressed emotions about death. I know, of course, that
most of my readers will not much care for this point of view–to
these many people I give enthusiastic encouragement to attend to
their own religious or other beliefs. To the small number whose
minds are not yet made up, I am just saying "Keep your mind
open."
In Vivation, we never need to do anything to get feelings
to come up. All the feelings are right here right now anyway. This
is certainly true of feelings about death. There is plenty of death
all around us no matter what anyway. When your feelings about death
come up, just explore what they feel like in your body (the feelings
themselves are composed of your aliveness), neither hold on to them
nor push them away, and make peace with them, exactly as they are.
This is the right direction. If you know how to Vive, then you will
reach peace and sanity about death far faster.